Dating and Emotional Success with Men

Why couples should seek out the help of a counsellor for their relationship issues

Virtually all couples go through 'rough patches', during which they struggle to maintain a healthy, happy relationship. Whilst it's perfectly normally for romantic partners to have the occasional argument, constant bickering may be cause for concern.  In such cases, the couple may benefit from the services of a counsellor who specialises in relationship problems. Here are two specific ways in which a counsellor can help a couple to get their partnership back on the right track.

They can help them to identify the source of their issues

One of the biggest hurdles which couples face when attempting to move past a rough patch in their relationship is determining what the real root of their problem actually is.

They might, for instance, find themselves frequently bickering over seemingly small things, such as one of them spending too much time socialising with their friends after work instead of coming home. In this example, the issue may not actually be about this person socialising but rather about their partner feeling neglected and lonely.

Their objectivity and professional training will enable a counsellor to identify these issues and thus help the couple to begin working towards resolving their real problems.

They can provide structure and accountability

Many couples attempt to address the issues within their relationships without professional counselling. In a lot of cases, despite their best efforts, they fail to find a resolution.

This is often because their solutions lack structure and consistency; they might, for example, promise to spend more quality time with one another but then find themselves regularly skipping their weekly scheduled 'date night' without ever bothering to discuss the reasons for their failure to commit to this activity. This could lead to one of them feeling resentment which, if it is not expressed, could then result in other problems later down the line.

A counsellor can devise a structured plan which will give a couple the detailed guidelines they need to overcome their issues. The plan might include setting them specific tasks (such as the aforementioned date night) along with techniques that will allow them to handle difficult situations they may encounter in a healthy, productive manner.

More importantly, a counsellor can also hold them accountable for their behaviour; for example, if one of them does not keep their promise to do their fair share of the household chores, the counsellor can provide the couple with the opportunity to acknowledge and discuss this issue in a calm, supportive environment.